Sunrise / Sunset: 7:10am, 5:44pm
Today’s Foo song: Times Like These
If there’s one thing I’ve learned the hard way, it’s that time is such a finite resource, but somehow I never seem good at managing it. It just gets away from me. On this 42nd lap around the sun, I’m more sensitive than ever about my shortcomings. Quotes like this embolden me and infuse me with a sense of desperation simultaenously: “No such thing as spare time, no such thing as free time, no such thing as downtime. all you got is lifetime. Go.” – Henry Rollins. Thanks sister for sending this my way. Eh, I think.
Today was no exception. The sunlight faded away. I’d planned to leave work by 4pm to have time to run before biking home and going to a (really fun) condo meeting, but somehow I didn’t make it out until 5:45pm, then had to rush home, struggle through the condo meeting hungry and distracted before ticking off a fellow condo owner by speaking a little too frankly about our collective financial responsibilities for a building flood that happened last year and has dragged on since then. Normally, I’m an expert at sugarcoating things and avoiding conflict, but not tonight.
All of this reminds me a bit of my old Anthrax shirt. My classmates at Dartmouth ridiculed me for it, but I loved it. From the song “Got the Time.” (Fun fact: “In 2012, Anthrax became the first metal band to have its music played on Mars when its Got The Time was chosen by NASA to wake up the Mars Rover.” http://www.prnewswire.com/news-releases/anthrax-celebrates-the-30th-anniversary-of-its-classic-spreading-the-disease-300161544.html)
Somehow, the way the bass guitar sounds on songs like that one, keeping time, repetitive, just grabs me. Always has. Maybe it’s my need for an external timekeeper, or to calm my brainwaves meditatively?
As today’s Foo Song goes, it’s times like these where you learn to live again. I keep trying to learn, to change habits. It’s not easy, but one small step at a time is the only way to do it. At least the publishing of this blog post happened on schedule!
Speaking of times like these, I’ll leave you with some Douglas Adams wisdom (i.e. listen to you know who!):
Arthur: You know, it’s at times like this, when I’m trapped in a Vogon airlock with a man from Betelgeuse, and I’m about to die of asphyxiation in deep space, that I really wish I’d listened to what my mother told me when I was young.
Ford: Why, what did she tell you?
Arthur: I don’t know, I wasn’t listening.